The Center for Cretaceous Studies and most likely the world's ONLY
Live Dinosaur Reserve & Theme Park
|SECURITY PREPARES FOR THE SUMMER SEASON
|To Keep Dinosaurs In Or Tourists Out? No One Knows For Sure
PROUD MEMBER OF THE MID-AMERICA PALEONTOLOGICAL SOCIETY
even though they asked us to go away
Look For The Center On Facebook!
why? for what sane reason would you do that?
|People for the Ethical Treatment Of Dinosaurs. Charter Member Since We Joined Last Week
WELCOME to the official CRETACEOUSLAND!
website you poor misguided soul!
You've just discovered the only LIVE Dinosaur reserve and theme park on the entire planet! What can you expect to find
while you're here - besides your worst nightmares coming true? NOTHING!!! That's right - we just moved the animals back to
their Winter Indoor Paddocks (IPs) at The Center. However, you are more than welcome to roam around the now-empty Habitats
to enjoy the scenery! And, who knows? You may encounter one of the man-eating, ferocious, killer DinoResidents that we forgot
to move! Hey, it's happened before.
Though the animals are gone until next Spring, here's some boring information to entice you to come and still risk your very
life - and those who surround you - by visiting! As the world's only outdoor, live DinoReserve, CRETACEOUSLAND!
is located just a quick ambulance ride from our parent company The Center for Cretaceous
Studies! In fact, we fight over the same parking spots every day.
So detailed and exact in the presentation of natural Cretaceous Period conditions, our scientists have gone to great lengths
(+/-2 centimeters) to raise the same vegetation found dozens of millions of years ago -- much to the chagrin of the U.S. EPA.
We've been in court over most of this stuff for decades.
We'll give you the opportunity to see Cretaceous Period flora and fauna in outdoor Habitats (HABs) as they originally, naturally
appeared 65+ MA (Million Years Ago), or BA as we call it (Before Asteroid). This also gives you an excellent chance
to contract some heretofore unknown and probably incurable prehistoric disease or allergy!
See? It just keeps getting better and better, doesn't it?
Take a moment or three to see what's in store for you and your family next summer when you resign yourself into visiting CRETACEOUSLAND! as a last ditch vacation idea, which it usually is.
Educational? Nope. Fun? Nah. Good value for the money? No way.
None of these apply here. But odds are, you'll never get to, er... want to... leave!
site for future news and information, as the CRETACEOUSLAND! company information (aka: water cooler rumors), found below,
is updated every time we have a reporter who survives another week in this death trap!
We think you'll agree with that one guy who nearly made it out of here alive:
A day at CRETACEOUSLAND! is like no other!
|CEO & FOUNDER JUST BEFORE BEING ASKED TO LEAVE DIG
|Booted From Hundreds Of Sites Hasn't Stopped Him From Screwing Up Around Here
THE CRETACEOUSLAND! NEWSUNDIES, er, NEWSBRIEFS
The Latest And Sorta-Kinda Up To Date Information On Who...What...Where...When...And Why ME?
On All Things CRETACEOUSLAND!
LAST UPDATED 6 MAR 2021
ANOTHER PIZZA-LOVING TYRANNOSAUR CAUGHT EATING PIZZA DELIVERY GUY
DinoAlert! Lasts Nearly 15 Minutes, Says Search & Rescue Team On Break
A Cretaceousland! Landscaping Department employee caught the thief on camera as it ran off with its stolen prize - a pizza
delivery guy. Pizza might not be a natural part of a Dinosaur’s diet, but some of these guys aren’t letting that
fact stop them. Pizza delivery guys are on that diet. Kind of.
That’s what Bob Ennalong showed his Supervisor when he shared the first-hand account and video of a pizza-loving tyrannosaurid
While it’s not clear where the DinoResident came from, Ennalong spotted the tyrannosaur grabbing the pizza delivery
person before running off with him all from the front seat in his company truck on Wednesday. He reportedly watched the animal
for around 10 minutes and shared a 50-second clip of the juvenile tyrannosaurid eating the pizza delivery guy, followed by
a large 3-meat pizza, which was later posted to and then removed by YourTube.
As of Thursday, the video racked up more than 4 views before being taken down.
However, Ennaong isn’t the only guy that has tyrannosaurids that like dine on delivery personnel. In fact, the strange
dietary preference has become so much of a common occurrence in the last few years that Ennalong's video was initially met
with an "eh, so what?" response.
Some employees have even gone a step further and have made accounts dedicated to highlighting DinoResidents chasing pizza
and other foods delivery people typically enjoyed by humans like burgers and tacos.
When they’re not getting caught on film eating pizza delivery employees from Jack's Snacks and other delicious food
delivery spots, DinoResidents have been found to snag a few slices from deliveries that are left at Cretaceousland! employee
For the most part, DinoResidents are considered carnivores that mainly eat meat and sometimes insects, eggs or other small
animals -- or anything that moves -- depending on the species.
According to the Cretaceoulsand! Pest Control Department, an average adult tyrannosaur eats about a 400 pounds of pizza per
week. Moreover, most species of the pizza delivery guy eaters can reach impressive speeds and jump several feet, which comes
in handy when it comes to surprising, slashing, biting, and then running off with it's food.
Read the REAL story: Another pizza-loving squirrel caught eating in a tree adds to growing documented incidents